The Harbor Dog Stories
Come on an adventure with the shop dogs of Two Salty Dogs as they spin you a yarn about life as a dog on the Boothbay Harbor waterfront.
MY NAME IS ZINNIA III - by Zinny
It is April on Southport Island now, and the cabin is open. This precious cabin. There is solace for an old dog here, perhaps even something like heaven. I bathe in the warm sun of the sliding glass doors until I grow sleepy. There is no crate here. There is swimming and walkies, and...
MY NAME IS ZINNIA II - by Zinny
I've heard some Bipeds say my story is too sad to continue reading. Others say they grow angry whilst reading it. I find both reactions curious. If anything, my story is one of love and triumph. Would you read my life's tale if I had been fed with a silver spoon? Gotten to work...
MY NAME IS ZINNIA - by Zinny
Do not judge my mother. Do not think her wicked. A body that has carried twelve beating hearts to birth stands already at the edge of surrender. She was emptied by us — not only of milk, but of something softer and more fragile. Even in those first days I sensed a heaviness in...
A CONSUMER BILL OF RIGHTS - by Don
We, the Unreasonable People... ... the fickle and rabid Consumers of the United States, in order to form a more perfect Consumer Union, establish Justice, insure Consumer Tranquility, provide for the Common Defense, promote the General Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Consumer Liberty, do ordain and establish this Consumer Constitution and Bill of...
THE ZEN OF ZINNY - by Don
So they did what any reptile lacking empathy did. They abandoned her in an alien, dangerous, and terrifying place and forgot all about her. I hate those cowards. The fact that they probably picked up a breeding dog on the way home after abandoning Zinny to keep the pup-money coming in made me furious....
K9 GUMSHOE - by Fudgie
Hi everyone!!! I'm Marz! I live at Chez Salty and I work at Two Salty Dogs Pet Outfitters in Boothbay Harbor!! I'm the best greeter in the whole state of Maine!!!! Even better than Wal-Mart!! Those greeter don't even shove their snouts in customer's crotches!!! That's pretty lame!!! You're a customer for Dog's Sake!...
ONCE THE HUNTER, STILL THE HUNTER - by Auggie
Tis true I hung my writing regalia up in February with my swan song, "It was the Best of Times, It was the End of Times." Like my hero Douglas MacArthur, I have returned, and I am now enjoying a significant period of respair, and shan't againwend for so much as a tinker's cuss. ...
A TWO SALTY DOGS SPECIAL REPORT: THE GREATEST THREAT TO AMERICA - by Don
Some will tell you the biggest threat to America is corporate greed. Others tell you assuredly that it is the decay of moral values. Then there's our shape-shifting reptilian overlords, manipulative cabals of financial and political power on the murky sidelines, pulling all the puppet strings. And don't forget the aliens: relentlessly cavity-probing us...
GRAVEL PIT OF DREAMS - by Marz
Don has to keep Auggie and Zinny out of The Pit!!! They're so old they can't get back up!! They get stuck in there!! One time Zinny got stuck in the sand and couldn't get back up, so we all had to go down and wade through a bunch of smelly, green, scum water...